One year later

I have been dreading today for a few months now. I wasn't sure how I would react. I wasn't sure how I would feel. Would I be able to handle it?

A year ago today Gloria gave me a ring and a promise of forever. And as life does, things have changed and our "forever" is not in the cards.

So today I'm taking a moment to reflect. I'm taking the time to be thankful for everything that is in my life. I truly feel like I'm right where I am supposed to be. My journey has brought me here. Gloria may not be "the one" as previously thought, but she brought joy and goodness to my life and in leaving she has helped me become stronger and realize what I want.

I am thankful for so much... my friends, my chosen family and the love bubble, YOGA (yoga helps me let go and I've been needing that), family, friends (I know I said that but I have amazing people in my life who are full of love and support who are there to be a shoulder to cry on and a pillar of strength)

Those are only a few of the things I'm thankful for. Each day I have a choice. My words and actions are an extension of who I am. Instead of feeling anger toward where life has lead me and think about what could/would/should have been, I choose to walk in peace and love and welcome the newness of life.

Thank you friends!

Change...

I feel very fortunate in life to find myself in places of inspiration. Lately the universe has brought me the things I need without me asking....
I have amazing friends the have lifted me up and continue to do so as I take this new journey. Sunday, I went to Earthsave Cincinnati's potluck and the speakers engaged us on activism. http://www.veganvideo.org. Monday night was another vegan potluck centering on world peace and veganism. Tonight I was at a fundraiser for our local women's choir MUSE and a musician by the name of Holly Near was there. Everyone there was at least 20 years older than me and together we all say "I ain't gonna study war no more" and tears came to my eyes. I have been blessed to be surrounded with beautiful souls who are active in making change in the world. It's all helping me find my peace and activate my soul.

Finality

Today I signed the papers to make the house G's. It has been quite the journey. I remember when I started this journey. When I first met G the love and the promise that just swept me away. This was to be something like no other. And in this journey I found great love. I found the ability to give of myself, things that I had never been able to give to anyone else.
I have also found that the song is right "sometimes love just isn't enough". Through my love I still could not make G happy. And I now know it is not my job to make her happy. Our happiness should not rely on each other - we should be happy with our without each other.
Knowing all of this doesn't make it easier, my heart still yearns for the love we once shared. Despite it all I know this path is the right one. And with selling the house to G I am one step closer to ending this chapter.

Hope Alone

Let's not drag this out
Everything's in motion
Though I've only ever loved you kind
And with devotion
Remember when I met you
You were leaving from the start
I thought one day you'd probably just come home
And break my heart
It's funny what you know
And still go on pretending
With no good evidence
You'll ever see that happy ending
You Looking for your distance
And sensing my resistance
You had to do your will
I had to learn the hard way
We were just an empty dream too big
For hope alone to fill
I know I'm a dreamer
So I'll give you that
Still I hope I'm more than just a place
You laid your hat
You're a land of secrets
Its only citizen
And though I paid my dues
I was never allowed in
And so I am a stranger
Especially today
Cause I get sad and lonely
And you get your way
You were looking for your distance
And sensing my resistance
You had to do your will
I had to learn the hard way
That we were just an empty dream too big
For hope alone to fill
Holding on for change
I know We never stood a chance
So I could only wait
And watch you slip right through my hands
You were always looking for your distance
And sensing my resistance
You had to do your will
I had to learn the hard way
We were just an empty dream too big

Perspective

I'm now staying with my friend Martha. We have been friends since 7th grade and are no strangers to living together - we did so throughout college. Yesterday I was sitting on the couch and said "you know - next weekend I will not be married." Knowing that this coming Saturday is now what I call my "not wedding day"
Martha, who is going through a divorce said "I wish next weekend I would no longer be married"
So it's all perspective.

This Crazy Life

Friday we decided to postpone the wedding. I can't believe it. I realized that something I've dreamed and planned for months can be cancelled in a mere two hours. This is probably the most painful thing I've experienced. The wedding has been postponed for reasons that are not my own so I will not share them. My hope is that we get past this moment and it makes us stronger. It's just crazy timing.

Yesterday was my last day with the Girl Scouts and today is my first day at my new job. So far the new job is great. They made me a vegan cake and I had coffee out of a rainbow mug. I will go home and pack for the next week or so. I'm not sure where I'm going as the house is not ready right now. I think I'll stay with friends for a couple weeks.

I'm trying not to let my sadness of cancelling the wedding affect me. Emotion is bubbling inside me but I know that the decision is for the best and I have good things ahead of me!

New Job

I have a lot of new things this year. It is a bit overwhelming but good. In a Whirlwind I applied for a job got an interview, second interview and BAM yesterday I was offered the job.

I will now be the Campaign Manager for Community Shares of Cincinnati. I describe them as the "grassroots United Way". I'm not sure anyone reads this but if you do you can go to www.cintishares.com.

I'm so very excited, I will finish up camp and then go straight to the new job. I'm ready to grow and learn.... expand my horizons!

New House

I have been keeping it a secret.... and I don't think anyone really reads this. Here is my announcement to the world....

I bought a house!

It's 120 years old. Absolutely adorable, and full of work. We'll be working on this house forever! But at least we won't be paying for it forever.

Let it Go!

I think at some point in our life's we all have to let someone or something go. I struggle with this sometimes. I have the tendency to fight for people. I know they are good people. I know they have a good heart. At the same time. As mentioned in an earlier blog, it takes two to make a friendship work. Friendships are work and it takes more than one person to do the work. So I'm taking a deep breath. And I'm letting go. Letting go for me means to let go of expectations. I can no longer expect everyone to live up to the standard I set for them. First, it's unfair, and second, not everyone is as thoughtful as I want them to be. It's not worth it and it ruins my sense of peace.

You know, all of this is also once sided. I think it's interesting, and I know I'm not the only who feels this way. But, I am currently unhappy with a "friend's" actions or lack there of. But she doesn't know. So who is this hurting? It's me. *Deep Cleansing Breathe* Internalizing does not make me productive.

When I can't say it better...

I am posting the link to the veganjoy blogspot. I can't say it better.


http://www.veganjoy.blogspot.com/

God's Followers

Last night, on my night off from camp I went to a lecture. A fundamentalist minister was talking about his diet. The Hallelujah diet, which is a vegan diet. I was intrigued. I do think Veganism is the wave of the future and that i will do what it takes to encourage others to take the road less traveled and stop animal cruelty. So far I use the cruelty and the health route. Never before did I think there would be a "God Route". And so there is.

I have to admit we left the lecture early as it was truly a sales pitch. Pitching to us to buy this guys product. After her preached his view on creationism. He really has one verse that justifies his diet.

Here is what I do agree with:

1. Doctors only have 2 hours or less of nutritional education, they almost always go the way of medication versus lifestyle change.
2. We are the only species who actually cooks their food, even other animal carnivores eat their meat raw... btw we are not supposed to be carnivorous, hence it makes us sick to do this. - I'm not sure I advocate a raw diet but anyway
3. Veganism can heal

As I said I did leave the seminar early - here is this guy's site, I am not endorsing him in anyway shape or form.

http://www.hacres.com

Friends

According to the band Cake, FRIEND is a four letter word.

I have been thinking about friendship a lot lately. Because I often wonder, is this person really my friend. I mean I wouldn't consider the people listed as "friends" on my facebook or myspace really my friends. Not all of them anyway. So why are they there. What defines a friend? I have seriously had people come out of the woodwork expecting me to invite them to my wedding. OK, so if I haven't talked to you or seen you in 5+ years, I'm not inviting you. Just because you were a part of my childhood does not make you a part of my present. And all that said, that doesn't mean I don't like you, it just means we aren't really friends anymore.
I feel like my friends are people that I would call in the middle of the night for an emergency. I can count those people on one hand. So does that mean I invite five people to my wedding? ha ha. That would cut down the cost.

OK I have to invite the relatives. But a friend is someone I want to hang out with in my free time. Someone who wants to hang out with me. Notice the two way street. In the past I've been the invite everyone along kind of girl, not anymore. Now I'm the "you have a phone too, pick it up" kind of girl.

It's also funny as we get older, or maybe just me. I'm not interested in shallow stuff. I could care less about surface info. In college and right after it was great to have a million friends and have plans all the time, now I have close ones.

I just think it's funny how loosely we use the word friends in so many situations.

My greatest disgust

One of the things I hate most about my job is that I sometimes have to be a hypocrite. I love camp! I love having kids at camp! I hate buying food for camp. I hate that I am vegan and have to feed these children rotting flesh. I hate that the meat and dairy industry subsidizes meat, dairy and eggs so much that I could never afford to feed the girls vegan chicken nuggets on the camp budget. It's cheaper to poison the children than to feed them a plant based healthy diet. GROSS.

Try as it might I have not been able to find bulk vegan chicken nuggets or bulk veggie crumbles. Will there ever be a day that costco or GFS or Sam's Club carries such things?

It's true, I hate that I use Girl Scout money to feed the meat and dairy industry.

When working out doesn't work out

I have been so good this week, five times to the gym. And let me tell you, I don't understand the people who love working out. I can't help but look at my time when I'm in a class or on the treadmill. The second I start working out I count down the minutes until it's over. I don't hate working out, I just don't LOOOOOVVVEE it.

Anyway, today I'm sore from exercises yesterday. Put the big ball between your legs and lift and squeeze several times, your inner thighs will hurt too.

So today, I go to the gym to use the treadmill, do a nice 3 mile walk at lunch. I have my Vegan Freak podcast all cued up and ready to go. I'm walking, laughing at the podcast and BAM some how I got my arm twisted in my headphone cord and my ipod flies away from me onto the floor. OK, stop the treadmill, pick it up, resume. I'm walking again, listening to the podcast, and I do it again. At this point I decide it's not meant to me and cut my losses. 2.75 miles has to do. And, my inner thighs still hurt.

Rant

It's one of those days... it's a day where I look at people and wonder if maybe I'm from another planet because I simply don't think the way others think.

I made plans to do something with someone a month or so ago and she is the one that invited me, and then she made other plans and never told me, I had to ask. I'm not mad... just confused because I wouldn't do that to someone else.

At the grocery store today the lady who was bagging (it was a Girl Scout event purchase so I needed the plastic bags) asked me if I wanted the the huge syrup bottle (which has a handle) and the orange juice (also has a handle) in a bag. Do people need bags for these types of things? I mean they already have handles. I don't understand why people are so wasteful.

I looked around my all staff meeting and over 50% of the people had a beverage in a one time use container. I'm no saint, I'm sure I do my fair share of wasting every once in a while, but I know these people waste everyday and probably never think to recycle.

I simply don't understand people.

Eggs

It's true, I wrote a blog.

I have not blogged in a while. I have thought about it, it just hasn't happened. I feel like I've been chasing my tail lately. Not in a bad way, just been busy.
G and I celebrated our meetaversary.... A year ago Friday we met each other. Neither one of us had any idea we'd be where we are now, and we are eternally grateful to have met and fallen in love, well I am, I can't speak for her, haha.
What else? We just started the Engine 2 Diet. I'm pretty excited. I have been reading quite a few books on health and our diet. I feel like it's the one thing we can control... our diet and our exercise. I can't change my genetics. G and I decided that one thing we wanted to do for each other is be healthy. We want to be around for each other as long as humanly possible. So, today is day two on the Engine 2. So far so good. (other books that lead to this are The World Peace Diet, Skinny Bitch and The China Study) Yesterday we had a vegan meatloaf that was amazing! Don't' be a doubter - it really was good! If you are reading this, and I don't know who does, I'm challenging you to really evaluate your diet. Don't go on some fad diet, but think about it... I cut out diet coke and coffee and turned to water - did you know to coffee - if I can't pronounce the ingredients I have to think long and hard before I'm going to eat it. I know! That means no more Oreos, but you know.... I want to live my life as long as I can live it, and it's in my hands.

That's all for now, stay tuned I plan on sharing more!

Another Year

Another year has come and gone. I always feel like New Years Resolutions are a bit silly as they are not really my new year. My new year comes with my birthday. And so it has passed. The best present in my life is the arrival of G. She is here. She arrived in Ohio on Friday. It's a great feeling to know that she is always going to be here. (When I say here I mean with me. Here is relative.) We spent so many months cramming in as much time together in short stints. And now our life together has a new beginning.

So, as new beginnings go, this is a great one. I'm so happy to be going on life's journey with her. She and I work perfectly together. We ran errands all day on Saturday, cleaned out closets, rearranged things. Sunday we had our engagement pictures taken. I'm looking forward to my new year!

Aging Well

You're Aging Well Dar Williams (© 1993 Burning Field Music, ASCAP, Administered by Bug)

Why is it that as we grow older and stronger
The road signs point us adrift and make us afraid
Saying, "You never can win," "Watch your back," "Where's your husband?"
Oh I don't like the signs that the signmakers made.
So I'm going to steal out with my paint and my brushes
I'll change the directions, I'll hit every street
It's the Tinseltown scandal, the Robin Hood vandal
She goes out and steals the King's English
And in the morning you wake up and the signs point to you
They say, "I'm so glad that you finally made it here,"
"You thought nobody cared, but I did, I could tell,"
And "This is your year," and "It always starts here,"
And oh, "You're aging well."
Well I know a woman with a collections of sticks
She could fight back the hundreds of voices she heard
And she could poke at the greed, she could fend off her need
And with anger she found she could pound every word.
But one voice got through, caught her up by surprise
It said, "Don't hold us back we're the story you tell,"
And no sooner than spoken, a spell had been broken
And the voices before her were trumpets and tympani
Violins, basses and woodwinds and cellos, singing
"We're so glad that you finally made it here
You thought nobody cared, but we did, we could tell
And now you'll dance through your days while the orchestra plays
And oh, you're aging well."
Now when I was fifteen, oh I knew it was over
The road to enchantment was not mine to take
'Cause lower calf, upper arm should be half what they are
I was breaking the laws that the signmakers made
And all I could eat was the poisonous apple
And that's not at story I was meant to survive
I was all out of choices, but the woman of voices
She turned round the corner with music around her,
She gave me the language that keeps me alive, she said
"I'm so glad that you finally made it here
With the things you know now, that only time could tell
Looking back, seeing far, landing right where we are
And oh, you're aging, oh, and I am aging, oh, aren't we aging well?"

Vegan Potluck

I love the Monday nights that I join my study group of "The World Peace Diet". I leave this group feeling refreshed and ready to share tasty vegan foods with everyone. Last night was one of those nights. We start each meeting enjoying the food we've all prepared for the occasion. The main theme of last night was Mexican food. I had a burrito that I swear was as big as my head! Hmmm Tasty! I brought a delicious vanilla cake with chocolate peanut butter frosting all from my favorite cookbook: "The Joy of Vegan Baking".

Last night we talked about our Journey to where we are in our veganism. It was great to hear the stories of everyone around the table. There is a woman who attends who has been vegan for over 30 years. She is in her 70's. She doesn't look a day over 50 and takes absolutely no medication. I also love her because she comes to these gatherings with her partner who makes the most incredible dishes. I think this shows how powerful a plant based diet can be.

"The China Study" tells us; Change your diet and dramatically reduce the risk of cancer, diabetes, heart disease and obesity. A deeper look into this research will connect many diseases in our world to a diet filled with animal products. After reading some of this research, I wonder why people continue to eat animal products knowing that I could kill them.

There will be more on this in later blogs.

New Name

I felt it was time to rename my blog. I think this is actually the third time. Although my wedding is a huge project that is going on in my life, there is much much more. The previous name limited me.

Living my truth is something I often have self talk about. It's in those moments where people tell me that being vegan is unnatural, or simply say "I wish you weren't vegan, this ___________ (insert whatever animal ridden product they are eating) is so good" In these moments I reflect inwardly before using my voice. Because the truth is my eating habits are mine to own, my choice, it is the choice that is right for me, the environment and all animals.

Living my truth is all of me, who I am. I'm not sure where I heard this, but i remember someone talking about their sexuality. Perhaps asking if he/she was gay. And the answer given was "I'm also gay". I loved this. What am I???
-I'm a red head
-I'm also a lesbian
-I'm also a woman
-I"m also a vegan
-I'm also 5'2"
-I'm also a Pisces
-I'm also a feminist
-I'm also a poet
-I'm also a musician
-I'm also a democrat

There are so many components to who we are, It's important to be all of who you are. Join me in living your truth.

Things that make me angry

So a woman can have 8 children at once....

Children are abused in the foster care system...

Yet people who will give a child a loving home...

Adoption policy favors 'traditional' couples Cincinnati Enquirer Cincinnati.Com

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Because Kara Said So...

I haven't blogged because I have nothing to say about our wedding really. I mean we have a caterer, that's exciting. We maybe, perhaps, kind of, sort of, might have an idea for invitations, but this isn't what consumes my mind these days...

What has been happening? Well let me tell you about my car. Oh, my car. I believe that my car's function is to take me where I want to go. It does not have to be pretty, it does not need to cost a lot of money... it simply has to go. And go it does. Well go it went.

About a month ago it didn't start, I had it towed and when the mechanic got to it, it miraculously started. Hmmm, what a conundrum.

So, I kept on driving the car....

And after stopping at Kohls on the way home it didn't start. I believe this happened because it was telling me not to shop... it wasn't like I bought anything. So Martha rescued me. And my car was once again towed... I had the starter replaced, two tires, and brakes, yay for spending money.

Two days later guess what happened? My car didn't start. That's right, and it was towed. Once at the mechanic, it started. I was told that I have to slam my car into park. I don't believe this to be true as this problem didn't exist until recently.

Ok fast forward to this past week. The snow storm and the fact the roads were never truly clear rattled something free on the back end of my car. I took the car in, again. And everything was taken care of and when I picked it up, they had broken the inside door handle... it's true.

So, on Friday, I took it in to get that repaired, which they paid for of course.

Alas, my car is paid off, and has been for a few years, but recently it has cost me quite a bit. Now I feel like it should work like it's brand new, I've put the money in for this to happen.

That's the story of my car...

Nothing to do with the wedding

I have no news to report on the wedding front, although I feel like I should blog. I think that after the wedding I will change my blog title... I'm already throwing some ideas around in my head, nothing to tell you yet!

I just wanted to say that I'm NOT a football fan, and at the same time, I thoroughly enjoyed the Superbowl. I mean the Steelers won, which is great! I think the real win was having a completely vegan party. I was a bit skeptical of my vegan spinach and artichoke dip and I think it was the clear winner! I am always happy to have people over, eat vegan food, and love it.

What else do I have to report?
I'm currently going through my Smallville seasons. I have 1-6. I'm on season 2 currently. Here is what I most recently discovered. Clark Kent is often seen wearing red or blue.

The Gown

So I tried to upload the image but because its moving and blah blah blah. I'm not that savvy. But, in my search for the ultimate bargain I purchased this dress:http://www4.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?ItemID=139394b&ItemTyp=G&GrpTyp=PRD&ShowMenu=T&ShopBy=0&SearchString=bridal&RefPage=SearchDepartment.aspx&s4PageSize=15&CmCatId=searchresults&Search1Prod=True

Let's talk bargain, it is originally priced at $150
I found it once and it's current cost for $75
I wanted to show it to G and on that weekend it was $50
I searched the web for a 15% off coupon
Now the dress was $42.50
Add shipping and tax, I've paid $53 for my dress

That's right! $53! I will have to have it shortened, and maybe taken in if I can get back on the workout train. G's clothing will most likely cost more, but not the challenge is on!

Simply Funny

I found this cartoon on the Gratitude in Motion website, they are sponsoring a class called "The World Peace Diet" based on Will Tuttle's book, and the first class is tonight!

the Whirlwind

Getting married certainly puts a new spin on a relationship, in the short amount of time that G was in town we experience quite a few emotions...

First, I'm angry at Delta right now and their rules. G's mother's surgery was rescheduled and I now won't be leaving town to see her, because she'll be here. I want to change my flight. My flight cost me $200, and the change fee is $150. Who wins here? Not me. And, they won't do anything on domestic flights for family emergencies....

Next... Appointments. Yes, we filled allot of our time together with meeting with potential vendors for our wedding. Is vendor the right word? I don't even know.

Let's start with the cake. Like I said in a previous blog I want it to be vegan. I want to be able to eat my wedding cake. So we met with one person how makes amazingly beautiful cakes. She was a sculpture in a previous life and, she makes great stuff. The taste is not great at all! This was discouraging. G was not happy. We searched and found another person... and bam... we had success. The Sweet Water Bakehouse makes amazing vegan cakes and a good price, nearly half the cost of the other woman. Her husband is vegan and when she makes non vegan cakes she at least uses a local farm with completely free range chickens. I like that she does not fuel factory farming.

Caterers - this is bad. G and I have exactly what we want in our mind. And I believe we have conveyed our wants and needs to the potential caters. I said EVERYTHING will be vegan. The only non vegan item will be chicken that will be free range and grilled separately. The salads, pasta, etc will be vegan. I got the first quote back from a potential caterer and it was full of cheese and some pepperoni, maybe there is something I don't know here, but I'm sure that these items are not vegan, pepperoni doesn't even fit for a vegetarian. But success is possible here, we had dinner at VegHead in Loveland on Saturday night and talked to the Chef, he might be able to be the answer to our catering dreams at a reasonable price. He buys locally, we'd support small business, and he knows what vegan means! I'm crossing my fingers to hear back from him with a proposal.

Photography - I will only pay $4,000 for photography if this individual will take pictures of me for the rest of my life. It's true, that is crazy to me. We met with some people and weren't terribly impressed and then, a camp friend offered to do it for free as a gift. Her work is better than some of the professional wedding photographers have been. The question is, do we want a second photographer?

Invitations - yes we can spend almost $1,500 on invitations. This is about 70 total invitations. And these invitations will be amazing, and organic, and recycled, but the person receiving it in the mail will most likely throw it out. I'm willing to pay under $100 on invitations, so we will continue the hunt. I hear Costco is reasonable.

Dress - Dresses are crazy to me. Paying hundreds of dollars for 6 hours of my life. Alas, I found a bargain through research and sales and have spent $53 total on my dress and it looks good. I just need to have it a bit shorter.

So where are we? We are on our way to planning a wedding that reflects us and is at a reasonable cost. Our fingers remained crossed, mine a bit tighter than G's. She'll be back in town in a few weeks and we will continue the search for perfect wedding items at a reasonable cost!

Inspiration

Babble

I feel like yesterday I babbled on my blog... maybe it was rambling... am I a rambling woman? HA! Anyway, I have to say that the bag of information from the bridal expo is still sitting on my living room floor. I'm getting ready to make appointments to meet with various vendors. I would like to be at the point that I just sign contracts and have things nailed down.
So here is the plan:
Look at new potential location
Taste Vegan Cakes (so far one baker can do this)
Meet with and get bids from Caterer
Figure out if I think I really can grow my own flowers
Photographer, in my future life this is what I should do for a living... $3,000 in one day seems like quite the business.

Ok I know there is more... I have to decide on attendants... ask them...
I have to figure out the dress thing and hope for no back fat! ACK!

Overload

Me, like many people I'm sure feel the time crunch. This isn't just the wedding time crunch, it's the life time crunch. I have made a rather large "to do" list for work and life. And, I'm going to have to start saying no when asked to add things to my plate:
So this weekend.... It started out by doing something for work on Saturday, then I was on the phone for three hours trying to figure out getting Internet to my house, and then it was out to see a show at the Southgate House. I woke up on Sunday, went to a bridal expo then took my little sister out. I got home around 6:30 and was too tired to do anything productive. I got some things done around the house like loading the dishwasher, laundry, moving some stuff to the massive garage sale pile... but I felt pretty brain dead.
I went through the pile of information and fliers I received at the bridal expo and was unable to process any of it last night. Poor G, I was on the phone with her last night and she could hear the exhaustion in my voice. It's times like that which make the distance worse. Ugh!
But let's talk a little more about this expo... there was a lot going on there. I knew photography was expensive.... but geez, it can get pricey! I looked at some people and thought to myself, hmmm, how would they feel if I told them this was a gay wedding. I mean, I was in a heterosexual mecca! When I would tell vendors that it was a same sex ceremony they instantly thought J.C. was my partner. This made me giggle a little on the inside. (J.C. you know I love you!)
My favorite response was:
Me "have you ever shot a same sex wedding"
Photography guy "Is that what you are doing?"
My thought "Yes sir, just made up my mind yesterday, I'm going to marry a woman instead of a man" Ha, what a funny comment. I'm sure it was just the shock of it, he had photographed a same sex ceremony before, so no bid deal, although it was a funny comment.
Last night I received a call from some travel agent at the expo telling me if I sat in on this thing I'd get a two night three day stay somewhere - wow, they work fast. Unfortunately my fiance has to join me and she is on the other side of the country. Oh well... it really was too good to be true.
I'm expecting a boatload of emails today from all the people I gave my email to. So wait and see... Oh wait there is more...
How could I forget....
Vegan...yes, Vegan... I love talking to people and seeing their face when I tell them I want no animal products in anything. I even asked the Pure Romance people, ha! So the cheesecake lady was definitely baffled by this... how does one make a cheesecake with out cream cheese... well you use vegan cream cheese... So the same sex vegan wedding is still on the hunt for the perfect group of vendors.....

All of it

I've been thinking I should post a blog... and I haven't... so here I am.
Getting married is so much more than a wedding. It's everything... absolutely everything. If someone told me even one year ago I would meet someone that I would share a bank account with... be willing to get rid of stuff I've had for years. On that note... who knew living alone for 6 years would make one acquire so much stuff.... ugh... I hate the amount of stuff I have.
Really, I never would have believed that I would be where I am today, fully committed to sharing my life...

With the floweriness of this it also has it's rough times... What bed will we choose, yours or mine, what couch... will we just buy new... can we afford that?

People get so worked up about the wedding... what about the marriage?

Money, Money, Money

I can't believe that people lay down tens of thousands of dollars on weddings. It is one day. If I had just $10,000 to spend in one day what would I do? I can tell you getting married probably would not be the first thing that comes to my mind. Well, maybe it would now that I'm engaged, but prior to that.... I would have to say no. I would maybe buy a car, pay off my student loans, pay off some debt. I'm trying to think of something I've always wanted and never spent the money on.... I would definitely spend the money on a vacation - a trip to Australia, maybe tour all of Europe.
So I'm trying to figure out why people spend all the money. Now I'm trying to imagine a wedding I've attended that I was so blown away that I thought "this is what I want". Nothing comes to mind.
G and I have really been toying with this whole thing. The expense alone is crazy. I think we run the risk of people judging us a bit if we don't go all out, but I imagine those people won't even make the guest list. We don't really like all that many people in general.
So why? Why spend the money on one day? What else could we do with the money?
Don't worry folks... it's still going to happen, maybe for a lesser cost though!